The title card slams down over a new cold open:
We open not in Vietnam, but at a Tobey Maguire-era Spider-Man 3 press junket, 2007. A nervous Kirk Lazarus (Robert Downey Jr., still as the “Australian method actor”) is asked about his controversial “pigmentation alteration” for an upcoming war film. Before he can answer, the screen glitches. A distorted voice— “The director’s cut is not for you. It’s for the people they left behind.” —throws us into a VHS-quality audition tape.
Then Les Grossman walks in. He holds up a phone. Tropic Thunder -2008- -Unrated Director--s Cut-...
We are on a . The entire jungle was a set. The cast is standing around, exhausted. Kirk Lazarus is out of character, talking to a therapist (played by Paul Thomas Anderson , uncredited). Tugg Speedman is crying into a Booty Sweat can.
“They still don’t know they’re in a movie… but now you will.” The title card slams down over a new
“Great news, you talentless wonders. The director’s cut just streamed 40 million minutes. They want a sequel. And this time…” He grins. “We’re shooting in .”
While hiding in a mud pit, Kirk Lazarus breaks character to ask Tugg: “Wait. Are we… are we in a comedy?” Tugg replies, “No, man. This is a gritty period drama.” A subtitle appears on screen: It is neither. Another subtitle: But the mine is real. A distorted voice— “The director’s cut is not for you
“They forgot me here. The director’s cut never ends. Send… craft services…”
A black screen. A single sound: “I’m a dude playin’ a dude disguised as another dude.” Then a heartbeat. Then a voice—Kirk Lazarus, still in Sgt. Lincoln Osiris makeup—whispering from inside a shipping container:
A door slams. A lock turns. The screen goes to static.